Out of the mouth of (old) babes...

So, dear Gert and I are sitting here quite early this morning as my 'date' tottled downstairs around 6 am for early coffee. We're in the living room, watching the morning news and on comes an expose about tanning. The piece is documenting how dangerous tanning beds are as they pretty much grill you from the inside out. The newscasters correlate the dangers of tanning with alcoholism, tobacco use, etc.

As the piece finishes up, Mom looks at me and says 'Great. Next they'll tell me to give up sex. I've got one damn thing to have fun with and they'll probably take that too...'

I believe the coffee spurted right out my nose...What a way to start the day.

Here's another Gertie-ism from today:

She's reading the paper and sort of muttering, half to me and half to herself. I start to listen in as some of these 'self' conversations are pretty funny. Newspaper is rattling, she's looking a bit confused over the top of the paper. She comes out with: It's been so long since I've looked at my horoscope that I'm not sure which one I'm in any more.

Scans the paper a bit longer, moves the paper up a bit and says 'I think I moved down a notch...'

Then finally, there's this other one from just today (the woman was on a roll):

I've been riding her a bit about not excusing herself after burping, or, for that matter, any other bodily noise. She's cute as hell - I'll hear her burp in the hallway, say 'excuse me' to no one and crack herself up. Funny. Anyway...

She says to me today 'I have a question. If I'm sitting on the pot and I burp and no one is in the house, do I have to say excuse me?' I laugh and say no. She said 'thank you - I wasted my breath on that one yesterday.'

Doctors, Doctors, everywhere!

Well, we've spent the last two weeks investigating Mom's shortness of breath. We've seen a pulmonologist (useless individual) and a cardiologist (fabulous man). It appears as though her shortness of breath issues are not lung related but may be cardiac - not a surprise given her advanced age and not particularly alarming either as they're periodic and clear fairly quickly.

Our latest travels found us at the pulmonologist who wanted to perform a 40 minute breathing test that was fairly strenuous. Since all signs (including the hospital ER Doctor's assessment during our 4 hour tour of Shady Grove) point to it not being a lung issue, she opted out and off to the cardiologist we go on Monday for a chemical stress test. She had this 2 years ago and it was a breeze so we don't expect any issues.

Took her out yesterday to Butler's Orchard to get fresh veggies for a dinner party tonight. Then, we rambled our way back to the house. One very interesting part of being a caregiver for her is that I see things and do things I normally wouldn't. How many of us are racing to get back to the house to, what? Clean the toilet? Nope, Gert and I frequently wander the back roads, ruminating on who the hell needs ALL that house, watching the teenage boys (11 of em!) playing basketball in a friend's backyard - this was particularly heartwarming as you hardly ever seen kids playing outside these days. They're all addicted to the tv or their gameboy or their computer or...you get the idea.

Anyway, we've been having some pretty good days around here. Mom reports that she's sleeping better even though her bedroom sounds like it's about to take off - I have an air conditioner, an air freshener and a humidifier in there for her. It's like staying in a hotel at the beach by the airport...But, she's happy so that's good by me!

I've recently started writing for examiner.com which is a blast. Here's a few fun articles, especially interesting for the elders among us (yes, I'm counting myself there, having move to Red Hat Society territory just last year):

Elder Fun 101 - Find a local Red Hat Society chapter near to Silver Spring, MD - LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the pic of dear Joe in this one.

Elder Travel 101: Where can I find travel activities?

And, I haven't forgotten the chocoholics:

FRIDAYS ONLY! Get a free Milky Way, M&Ms, Snickers, Dove or Twix chocolate bar!!

Here's my profile - if you care! http://www.examiner.com/x-15629-Silver-Spring-Elder-Care-Examiner

A new boat home...

Well, John and I had a fantastic day on the boat yesterday. I wanted to practice getting out of the slip and heading out for the Bay and, if I say so myself, I had a spectacular maiden voyage. No issues at all, Namaste responded to my fledgling captaining very well, much to my delight (and, John's amazement!). Got out to the Bay and held her steady as John upped the sails and off we went. Got up to 6.2 miles under sail, heeling (leaning over) all the way. Totally loved it! What a great time. Dropped anchor and spent an hour swimming in a jellyfish-free Chesapeake. Water temp was 73.5 and incredibly comfortable.

I got up this morning around 3, which seems to be my normal time of awakening these days. Around 5, snapped the pics of an awe-inspiring sunrise over the marina - tried to wake John but he wasn't having it. The rocking of the boat was too comforting.





We did get a nice walk in over to get coffee at the Java Stop and then continued onto Petey Greene's which is supposed to be open for breakfast - yeah, they open at 11 - ok, maybe not everyone wakes at 3, but really 11?? Anyway, once we found our favorite spot closed, John suggested we head to Chesapeake Beach for breakfast and what a fateful decision it was.

We got to Chesapeake beach and had a great breakfast at the hotel, overlooking the marina. Decided to walk out and talk to a few of the boat owners about rental slip rates for the marina. Long story short (too late), in 3 quick hours, we had already moved the boat to our new marina spot! It's gorgeous and we have an incredible spot, just the second from the bulkhead which means we're out in the Bay at full speed in less than 5 minutes. And the best part of all is that we can take Mom to the hotel, about 100 feet from the boat, get a bay-front room for the night, and get some gambling in too (they have slots there). Really excited about the rest of the summer at our new 'home.' The people we met today were very nice and welcoming - I think we're in for some big fun! And, to top it off, I was up $45 in about 3 minutes on the slot machine before John pulled me away - good move.

Picture to the left was snapped this morning on our walk - in coming home and reviewing the shots, this one cracked me up. It looks like a raven wedding to me...