On being thankful.

Rita is a huge Gertie fan, as am I

So, as Mom and I sit here Thanksgiving night watching The Ghost and Mrs. Muir (did I mention I've gotten a Netflix account?...), I'm thinking about how thankful I am for all that we have.

I ran over to Bobbi's today to gather her mother's excellent green beans, some mashed potatoes, and a delightful succotash mixture from Bobbi's family's Thanksgiving gathering. Mom and I were planning on heading to Ron's for a cocktail hour today but Nora has a cold and, well, it turns out that Gert wasn't going anywhere today anyway.

Luckily, we had a very small (read: very small) early Thanksgiving dinner last night. Just Bobbi, John, Mom and I were to share a turkey, stuffing, fresh rolls, drunken sweet potatoes, spirited Pumpkin pie, Apple and caramel crust pie, crack cookies, sausage and cheese puffs, and, um, cocktails. Mom and I cooked most of the day - emphasis on 'I', not so much on 'Mom' although she did direct me in a few details. I still hate touching a dead turkey (versus a live turkey..) so she talked me through the 'ugh, ewwwww' factor. Bird in oven, rolls rising, cocktails in hand, we napped, chatted, napped and chatted.

Salad days

To anyone over 40, 'salad days' means a time of youth, innocence and inexperience. To me, salad days means I planted the garden! Yes, and, this year, it's a dedicated garden in the back 40 again instead of being jerryrigged around the pool area. So, in went tomatoes, radishes, arugula (LOTS of it), summer squash, zucchini, patty pan squash (mom loves those), cantaloupe, cucumbers, peas and beans. All is looking quite well at the moment as the garden area is contained by a 6 foot tall fence to thwart the deer and rabbits - seems to be working at the moment. Everything is flourishing.

I have a nice herb section on the deck - Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme (there's a song in there), sweet stems of basil (one of my favorites), lemon sage. Speaking of herbs, here's a nice article about growing rosemary which grows so s-l-o-w. This is from a friend, Susan Golis, on ehow: How to grown creeping rosemary. It's a nice article and a good herb to try out - love it on roasted pork. And, if you have a garden and plant carrots, here's my friend Peggy's nice article about how to make a great carrot cake. I love good recipes like that. Yummy.

Now, the most interesting part of this story is that I've fallen head over heels in love with tomatoes, having spent 50 years of my life deploring the red, spitting things. It wasn't until Dad died, that summer of 2007, that I started eyeing tomatoes with a different, well, eye. Somehow, and this is akin to someone who has been blind waking up and seeing one day, I fell in love hard with tomatoes. I just couldn't get enough of the things. If they didn't get so soggy, they would have been inserted in my coffee cup. No one was more surprised than me, except, possibly, Gert. I truly believe it was my Dad's spirit engulfing me. His love of tomatoes was so strong that he used to take a salt shaker into the garden and sit and just dine for an hour or so, picking the ripest, reddest fruit. At those 'pick you own stands' we always used to kid that they should have weighted Dad at the end of our visit instead of the paltry 4 tomatoes he held out like a kid in his paper sack.

I've also got Dad and my sister's memorial garden going pretty nicely this year. I lost some trees in the blizzard and, as with anything, the loss of something is the gain of something else. So, the loss of those towering pines means the sun shines down more freely into my small garden and I have more of a choice of plants. So, I started tending it with relish this year and added in some more flowers, hostas, and even 2 hydrageas for those beautiful blooms that will adorn our picnic table.

So, as I tend to my little plots of earth, I sit and think about my Dad and sister. It's one of the few times I get to just focus on memories of Dad. Oh, sure, Mom and I speak of him all the time - his presence is still quite strong between us and in this house that he loved. We still laugh at the things I used to make him do, like put on funny red hats, or the way he called those bug candles 'cinderella candles.' We talk about how he loved Killian and how much he and Rita would have bonded. And, we laugh at Gizmo's legs as they pretty much mirror my darling father's skinny legs, so skinny, so white. Yep, he might not be sitting here in the flesh, but he's here all right. And, that's quite comforting as my own salad days wane.

Dad's garden

So, I spent a few hours the other day taking Mom around to various nurseries and picking up some fresh plants for Dad's garden. This is a memorial garden that I planted in memory of my Dad and sister, Steph back in 2007. It's doing fairly well but, since it's a shade garden, it's difficult to keep it interesting. I think I might have nailed it this time. It's quite peaceful out there and a lot of fun to watch it grow, I think Dad and Steph would have liked it. Purple was Steph's favorite color so I try to keep that in mind.

The angel face rose below is the most fragrant rose we've ever smelled. It's finicky but totally delightful. The gargoyle reminds me of Chessie, a dog I had once, half sharpei, half pit bull. He was sweet as sugar (mostly) and would protect me to no end. The gargoyle protects the garden, mom, John and me from evil spirits (so the theory goes). It certainly doesn't protect the garden from grazing deer...

Mom's parents - Minnie and Sam Jorban

Was cleaning up my Yahoo mail (over 2000 emails - good grief!) and found, buried under the 'Js', this fabulous picture - thanks to cousin Brad Jorban - Brad, forever the funny man titled the email 'I know what you're thinking. Is it Minnie and Sam or Angelina and Brad? Funny funny dude.

Mom and I have spent a good hour trying to figure out when it was taken. We though originally that it would have been at their 50th anniversary but then we dismissed the thought. Whenever it was taken, we both find it gorgeous. Mom said she remembers the dress as being a black, silk outfit with that sweater shaw that went just around the shoulders - quite a fashionable number back then. Bubie looks to be around 60 or so to me. Mom looked at it and, the first thing she said was 'look how young she is.' Of course, pretty much everyone is young when one is 93 (or 52....).

Bubie and Zaidie had the best grandparent's house in the world. It was a brick house in St. Joe, Mo on Sylvanie street (1216 Sylvanie Street, to be exact). Around the corner was the St. Joe Museum where we children spent many hours during our summer visits. It was also within easy earshot of the railroad, and, unfortunately, within 'noseshot' of the cattle feeding stations...smelly...

I remember one time when we were visiting, it was a hot, steamy night and the wind was blowing the stench from the cattle fields right past the screened in porch where I was trying to sleep. Ugh. I must have been 9 or 10, no older. I know it was an endless night and I was miserable. Dad came out at some point and found me awake and shaking in anger at the timed trains which were disturbing the small amount of sleep I could grab - I credit this house for the start of my lifelong insomnia. Anyway, Dad came out because the trains and heat were getting to him too. He decided we should take a ride, just the two of us. We went to the White Castle where we had pie and milk for me, coffee for him. I think it was around 2:30 am or so and I remember that the crowd was interesting (that's what I thought pimps were back then....).

Anyway, we bought Mom some Cherry Mash candies, I think it was a full box. Yes, Dad loved Mom that much - he was always buying her favorite candies when he could get 'em. So, we finished there and were heading back home when we spotted a train. I still remember him pulling the car over at the railroad crossing, knocking me on the shoulder with a 'come on, let's get out.' I got out with him, he looked at me, laughed, and shook his fist at the train; must have been before the finger was invented.... I laughed and did the same. Somehow, that little action, and the bonding of that moment, stayed with us both. Dad remembered the story as much as I did. In that small moment, a great memory was born.

Winter is approaching

It's only 43 degrees out today so Autumn is in full swing. I've got a fire working to warm the living room and keep Gertie warm and toasty. Mom and I were just discussing the choice of this woodstove last year - it was WAY more expensive than I had budgeted but we both love it very much. And, it holds a fire like no other.

I've got 4 dogs at the groomer today and 1 happy cat relaxing in front of the fire. Ah, bring on the snowy days!

Remembering Uncle Al (1917-2009)

We got sad news a few days ago; Mom's 'baby' brother, my dear Uncle Al, died Saturday at 91 years of age - he's the one in the front in the picture to the left (I think he thought he was taller than he was....).

My favorite Uncle had fallen a few days prior and was in hospice when he just slipped away. Although the death of an elder is, in a sad way, not unexpected, it's never easy. We were very saddened over here, but still managed to raise a glass of sherry in his honor. BFF Bobbi came over to lighten the mood which was a nice relief. It's sometimes difficult to prop Gert up, even though she is very resilient and very wonderful.

Note: that very handsome man to the left in the photo was my gorgeous cousin, Jay - Uncle Al's son who passed away a few years ago from cancer. Jay and I were co-conspirators in crashing the Presidential Summit held in Philly when Bush was in office. But, that's a story for another time.

There were 5 children in Mom's family; Aunt Rose, Aunt Ruby, Uncle Herman, Mom, and Uncle Al. Four of these children lived into their 80's which, if you think about it, is amazing considering they were all born in the early 1900s. And, quite thankfully, Gert is doing quite well over here and about to be 93 on the 28th of October.

When I was growing up, we took yearly trips back to St. Joe, MO to visit my mom's parents (my Bubie and Zadie) and the rest of her family. I remember so well the stories her brothers and sisters would share with us about the antics that Mom and Uncle Al got into as children - like oiling Zadie's wallpapering board (his livelihood) so that they could slide down it and amuse themselves. Or the time Uncle Al ducked when a rival threw a brick at him and the brick took out a plate glass window at the pharmacy - only time in history a kid's been beaten for ducking!

And, of course, we, the next generation of Burdoo children, in a way, owe Uncle Al our lives. It was Uncle Al who knew Dad from their fraternity at school. Uncle Al invited my Dad on a hayride to be a date for his sister (enter my Mom) ‘with the good personality’. Of course, Dad's first question was 'is she cute?' Uncle Al's reply was honest and to the point: 'Hell no she's not cute but you'll have a great time with her.' And, they did, for 65.5 years.

On my folk's 25th anniversary, they went to Hawaii, with a brief layover in California. Now, Uncle Al and his wife (Aunt Lois) had move to LA right after my folks had married. Uncle Al and my folks were living on separate coasts of the US. Back in the day, air travel was not as easy to come by as it is today and, with both siblings raising families, they didn't see each other for 25 years. So, as the story goes, Mom and Dad stopped in for a quick visit to LA. As Uncle Al met them at the airport, he clapped Dad on the back and said 'You sure hold a hell of a grudge.' That pretty much sums up my Uncle's humor.

And, of course, there were all the wonderful times I spent with him in Arizona every year when I went to visit the folks. I'd always pick him up and take him out for marguerita's at Arriba's (our favorite spot) and sit and laugh the afternoon away. He and Mom shared the same sense of humor - he never failed to get me laughing, and laughing hard.

He and Aunt Lois happened to have the only bathtub, it appeared, in the entire city of Sun City, AZ. So, each year, I'd drop in with my bathrobe in tow to soak in the tub - showers are ok but there's nothing like a bath for relaxation. One time, I brought along some cookies I'd made and the three of us laid in their bed eating cookies, drinking milk and laughing. He never failed to remind me of that time. He also never failed to send off a card for a family birthday or anniversary - it was always magical when a card appeared on the exact special day.

When Uncle Al retired, he became quite the artist - wood was his first media, then there was stones - all kinds of jewelry came my way. I'm the recipient of miles of beautiful beads and earrings.

And, really, who can forget the mini-basset head bashers he made (well, that's what I used them for). Uncle Al, in later years, became quite the woodworker and made these things (said basset head basher) which were actually thoughtful tools designed to push items safely into a garbage disposal. Well, the theory was nice but, since my house is from 1857, I don't have such luxuries as a garbage disposal (or air conditioning, for that matter!). And, who can forget the toaster tongs (by the dozens) he sent over? I do have some very nice handmade bowls and spoons and a few gorgeous stained glass lamps - he gave that up when he tired of running to the drugstore for bandaids. Figures; that was one craft I really loved. I have a few very beautiful stained glass windows he made which I enjoy daily. And, he's the one we have to thank for the profusion of stone clocks we've all grown to love - I mean PROFUSION....

So, then there was one. Mom is the lone child left from her generation and I'm so glad she's here with me. So very glad. I tell her daily how lucky I am to have her with me.

I took Mom out this weekend for a little car ride. I decided to wander a few backroads and take her across the ford on our road to the 'other side of the woods'. We ended up wandering up toward Sugar Loaf, our only mountain which is, oh 700 feet tall. On the way though, we found ourselves wandering past a local winery where, of course, we just had to stop, get a few glasses of wine, olive and cheese platter. I'm always amazed at the amount of people who smile, wave, and talk to Mom (I'm invisible). It's just adorable to watch - especially the teenage boys who totally let down their guard with her.

So, on the way back, I took us on a tour of a nice cemetery up there - there's a Judaic gardens that I've always been curious about but never been in. It's gorgeous - as far as cemeteries go - very serene, birdbaths hold the memorial stones that we drop on headstones when we visit. It's a fairly new cemetery and very well cared for - much more like a park than a cemetery. We rounded the road to a particularly beautiful corner with a family plot tucked away down a small secluded meadow, surrounded on all side by oak trees with changing leaves. I mentioned that, if you had to go, that's not a bad place to spend eternity. Mom looks at me and says 'I prefer not to go.' Good enough.

Knowing Gert better....

So, I got this quiz forwarded to me on Facebook. I don't generally do these things but thought it would be fun to have Mom complete it. She sure looks boring by her answers below. I might need to do this quiz too, now that I think of it. The below answers are from dear Gert (my comments are in blue)...

1. Been arrested? N

2. Kissed someone you didn't like? N

3. Slept in until 5:00 PM? N

4. Ran a red light? N (I don't believe it....)

5. Been suspended from school? N

6. Experienced love at first sight? Y (Joe!)

7. Totaled your car in an accident? Y

8. Been fired from a job? N (not fired, laid off - JC Penney)

9. Fired somebody? Y

10. Sang karaoke in public? N

11. Pointed a real gun at someone? N

12. Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? N (don't believe this one either - she says she doesn't want to flunk this test..)

13. Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Y

14. Kissed in the rain? Y

15. Had a close brush with death (your own)? N

16. Seen someone die? N

17. Played spin-the-bottle? Y (In school, we'd play spin the bottle - schools must have been 'looser' back then....)

18. Smoked a cigar? N

19. Sat on a rooftop? Y (and got paddled for it when Bubie found out....)

20. Smuggled something into another country? N

21. Grown your own vegetables? N

22. Broken a bone? N

22. Posed for a racy photograph? N (this one elicited a long 'Noooooooo' - I didn't ask...)

23. Eaten a bug? N

24. Sleepwalked? N

25. Walked a moonlit beach? N

26. Rode a motorcycle? No (this one came out with a long 'I don't think so...my mother wouldn't let me.' Funny thing is my mother won't let me either and now I have a rather large scar on the back of my right leg so I understand this rule now).

27. Dumped someone? N

28. Lied to avoid a ticket? N (I'm thinking Mother Theresa is sitting here next to me and I KNOW that ain't right).

29. Ridden in a helicopter? N

30. Shaved your head? N

31. Made a loved one cry? Y

32. Eaten snake? N

33. Marched, demonstrated, or protested in public? N

34. Buried a pet in the back yard? N

35. Vomited on an amusement ride? N

36. Seriously and intentionally boycotted something? N

37. Been in a band? N

38. Been on TV? N

39. Shot a gun? Y

40. Skinny-dipped? N

41. Gave someone stitches? N

42. Ridden a surfboard? N

43. Drank straight from a liquor bottle? N (hmmm...now I know she's not right as I have a picture, somewhere, of her sucking down liquor....note to self: must find photo)

44. Had surgery? Y

45. Sent back a meal in a restaurant because it wasn't acceptable? N

46. Taken by ambulance to hospital? Y (Sadly, yes...)

47. Fainted? Y

48. Been in handcuffs? N (hmmm...this No was slow in coming...)

49. Donated blood? N

50. Written a love poem? N

51. Eaten alligator meat? N

52. Killed an animal? N

53. Seen a U.S. president in person? N

54. Sneaked into a movie without paying? N

55. Written graffiti? N

56. Still love someone you shouldn't? N

57. Saved someone's life? N

58. Believe in love? Y

Now, since the above quiz seems like I have a quite boring, strait-laced mother, let's make up some questions of our own...

1. Ever cheated in poker? N (hmmmm....)

2. Ever lost more than $1000 gambling? Y

3. Seen Michael Jackson? Y

4. Worked your ass off (this was her helpful entry into the list): Y

5. Loved a dog? Y

6. Put lard on your father's wallpaper board (which, btw, he used in his livelihood...) and use it as a sliding board with your baby brother (who is 91 now): Y

7. Driven a turquoise and white Desoto convertible? Y - sure wish we still had that car...sigh.

8. Know how to answer a bluetooth? Y (hello?).

9. Loved the same man 65.5 year? Y (that love remains today too..)

10. Had a favorite child? Y (didn't ask - didn't want to know).

Doctors, Doctors, everywhere!

Well, we've spent the last two weeks investigating Mom's shortness of breath. We've seen a pulmonologist (useless individual) and a cardiologist (fabulous man). It appears as though her shortness of breath issues are not lung related but may be cardiac - not a surprise given her advanced age and not particularly alarming either as they're periodic and clear fairly quickly.

Our latest travels found us at the pulmonologist who wanted to perform a 40 minute breathing test that was fairly strenuous. Since all signs (including the hospital ER Doctor's assessment during our 4 hour tour of Shady Grove) point to it not being a lung issue, she opted out and off to the cardiologist we go on Monday for a chemical stress test. She had this 2 years ago and it was a breeze so we don't expect any issues.

Took her out yesterday to Butler's Orchard to get fresh veggies for a dinner party tonight. Then, we rambled our way back to the house. One very interesting part of being a caregiver for her is that I see things and do things I normally wouldn't. How many of us are racing to get back to the house to, what? Clean the toilet? Nope, Gert and I frequently wander the back roads, ruminating on who the hell needs ALL that house, watching the teenage boys (11 of em!) playing basketball in a friend's backyard - this was particularly heartwarming as you hardly ever seen kids playing outside these days. They're all addicted to the tv or their gameboy or their computer or...you get the idea.

Anyway, we've been having some pretty good days around here. Mom reports that she's sleeping better even though her bedroom sounds like it's about to take off - I have an air conditioner, an air freshener and a humidifier in there for her. It's like staying in a hotel at the beach by the airport...But, she's happy so that's good by me!

I've recently started writing for examiner.com which is a blast. Here's a few fun articles, especially interesting for the elders among us (yes, I'm counting myself there, having move to Red Hat Society territory just last year):

Elder Fun 101 - Find a local Red Hat Society chapter near to Silver Spring, MD - LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the pic of dear Joe in this one.

Elder Travel 101: Where can I find travel activities?

And, I haven't forgotten the chocoholics:

FRIDAYS ONLY! Get a free Milky Way, M&Ms, Snickers, Dove or Twix chocolate bar!!

Here's my profile - if you care! http://www.examiner.com/x-15629-Silver-Spring-Elder-Care-Examiner

Missing Dad!

Well, lookie, lookie! We've got our first tomato and, let me tell you, dear Joe has been sitting on my shoulder every single time I went outside to check its ripening status. I could literally hear his voice 'It's not ready yet.' 'No, not today, maybe next week.' 'It's looking pretty red, Lori' and so on. Yesterday, when I went to pick it and presented it to Gert, I heard Dad say 'Is that it?' Amazing how he impacts my life daily, even though he's no longer physically with us.

I find it interesting also that I've become a tomato eater just in the last 2 years since Dad's been gone. Always hated the little buggers but now I actually crave them. It must be his spirit infusing itself in me as he loved nothing more than to head to the garden with a salt shaker. He'd come back in 30 minutes, licking his lips and rubbing his belly.

Mom recalls a trip down to the Everglades in Florida where they went into a pick-your-own tomato field. When they got their sack of tomatoes and the proprietor put them on the scale, Mom told the gyy that he should weigh Dad instead of the sack...

Gert's doing ok but is having spells of shortness of breath still. I've finally got her adjusted to using the inhaler (boy, was THAT an interesting time...) as we use something called a 'spacer' with it. Much easier to use now although she still can't use it alone but that's ok, I don't mind helping her. I'm hoping though that, after her cat scan and follow up appointment with the pulmonologist next month, we'll have a clear reason why she's having periodic episodes. I've been checking the air quality index (AQI) daily to see what the code is and have certainly been aware of restricting even going on the porch to days when the AQI is excellent. Otherwise, she's pretty well and keeps me entertained, as do the dogs and the cat.

We're on our way to being millionaires...

Ha, sure...

Mom and I have decided that we just can't let the Belmont Stakes run without a bit of our money on the winning horse (it's our theory anyway). Now, this 'theory' has already cost me an extra $50 as, when John and I went to the Cracked Claw last night to place Mom and my's bet (100 to win on Mine That Bird, 20 across the board on the same horse - well, we couldn't decide....). Anyway, the gambler in me just had to hit a few races so, $50 later, I had nada. Nothing. No money. Out.

My Dad was there, right on my shoulder, as I placed my (stupid) bets last night. I bought a program for $4 (but not before checking the trashcans for tossed ones....). John and I looked through the program and picked horses by names - yep, you read that right. No need to check if it was a 'mudder', no need to find if it was a 3 year old maiden (never won a race....). Nope, we didn't need any of those pesky statistics that the owners throw at you; after all, the font is SO small, who over 50 can read it anyway....?

So, we picked by name - come on, who can LOSE with 'Tequila At Sunset'? We could. And, how about 'Kitty Power'?! I mean, come on now... I have a CAT! And, lest we need to explain 'Harbor Lights', who, as I type, is probably rounding the last curve right now.....

We laughed like hell. We were idiots - we faded right into the derelicts around us.

The best bet though was the one I placed in the last seconds before race 4 was about to be run at Penn National race track. The horse was named 'I Will Win' - now, really! Who the hell wouldn't go for that horse? This was a horse with confidence - And, the really funny thing was that there were 10 horses planned for the race and 5 scratched due to the muddy track. That left only 5 horses to run, and I Will Win went off at 10-1!!!! This was not a decision! We HAD to bet on her (3 year old maiden....). So, I went to the make the bet and bet just $2 on the win - none of that 2 dollars across the board needed on this horse. After all, she was going to WIN. After all, they've all but assured this when they named the sucker...We also had another horse in the same race so, we had a 2 out of 5 chance of winning something...
We would have had a better shot if this horse had run...

I'm sure I don't need to detail the moans, groans and cries of disgust as I Will Win came in 2nd. Yes, 2nd. I only had her to win - dammit....John just was astonished that I hadn't bet here across the board, then, at least, we would have gotten something! Nope, I 'saved' $4 by only betting 2 and missed a quite nice payout...

Well, we did quite badly. At one point, John told me that he thought my Dad was tossing in his grave - he was right on. I could hear Dad yelling 'WHAT are you DOING?' 'You shouldn't even be HERE!' 'GO HOME NOW.' John had me laughing so hard on the way home that I had to pull over. I couldn't see.

I don't believe John and I will be back to the Cracked Claw for quite a while...

Anyway, Mom and I went for Mine That Bird for the Belmont (well, our last name is BURDoo....). That horse better come in...

Well, anyway, I'd better find another way to make money so here's my latest eHow: How to Make A Delicious Low Carb Egg Salad

On blogging, or, well, not...

Ok, I hear you people! I've been very remiss about updating the blog so will try, again (sigh), to be diligent and post at least a few times a week.

So, what's been going on at the Mansion East? Not a hell of a lot! Gert is doing quite well - with the break in the weather, I actually got her to go out twice last week. One day, we went to Bed, Bath and Beyond where she bought me a nice quilt and bedsheets for my birthday. Then, we tottled over to La Mex where we sat at the bar (whiskey sour for her, marguerita for me) and chatted with the other locals. Had a great time. Today, we have planned to head over to do some off-track betting at the Cracked Claw - we'll, hopefully, go for lunch and place a few bets while we sit there. The real reason for the outing though is to place a few bets on the Belmont Stakes race - Mom and I will take any opportunity to gamble!


Picture to the left is Mom watching a video on the computer - I just thought it was a cute mix of the old and the young.... The other pic is not a particularly good pic of Mom but it highlights the choice little dog sitting spot in the house. If Matee isn't on the back of Mom's chair, Rita is. Can someone please tell me the exact date and time when we lost control?!

Bobbi, John and I spent a nice happy hour last week over at the Comus Inn which is over by Sugarloaf Mountain (it's the closest we get to a 'real' mountain at 1282 feet....). Anyway, happy hour was great - started inside as it was dribbling rain then the sun came out, right in time for sunset! Nice time was had by all

For my birthday, Mom took John, Sophia and me over for fondue to The Melting Pot. If you haven't been there, it's great! It's one of John and my's favorite spots. What I didn't think about though was that I would end up cooking Mom's dinner anyway that night as the poor thing couldn't quite reach the pot in the middle of the table! Had a lot of laughs though. She's so much fun to have around.

Last weekend, Sophia stayed with Mom Saturday night while John and I took the boat down to Cambridge for the evening. He gave me a night in a gorgeous B&B just 1/2 block from the marina where we left the boat. We walked the town, had dinner on the water at Snapper's (ok food, better location - tiki bar was great though and they have a 'beach' area where you can sit in Adirondack chairs in the sand). The next morning found us drinking hot coffee on the front porch of the old B&B which is actually older than my house by 10 years, having been built in 1847! Anyway, we sat on the beautiful front porch and watched, with a bit of dismay, at the deluge occurring outside. I was a bit concerned about how we were going to get home as I didn't have coverage for Mom for Sunday night. I figured, if worse came to worse and the weather didn't break, I could rent a car and just drive it. Anyway, as we considered the options, the weather broke into a fabulous day! We powered the boat to the Bay and then spent the rest of the day sailing around. We stopped outside of Chesapeake Beach, anchored the boat, threw a float overboard and hopped in after it. Water was a nice temp - 71.5 degrees which was just perfect for a few hour float. We also met up with a great friend of John's, Alfonso, who has a new gorgeous sailboat (pictures follow). We sailed along with him for awhile before pulling down the sails and motoring over to the marina where we stowed the boat and went to Petey Green's Restaurant for a fabulous dinner of fresh crabs (well, for me at least - John's too much of a weenie to pick crabs...). I saved all the claws and brought them home for Mom as she just loves the things. So, the weekend was incredible....

I've still been writing for eHow - actually made $98 last month - woohoo. Hell, it's a few happy hour cocktails! Here's a list of the latest since I last blogged - head over, read them and share them with your friends (please!) - as you'll note by the last few, I'm very into blue crabs this year!

How to Get In Shape For Just $75

How to Save Money On Fresh Herbs

How to Sell A Used Car Online

How to Buy The Best Sunscreen

How to Rent A Designer Dress For Less Online

How to Brew A Cup Of White Tea

How to Apply For Affordable Section 8 Housing

How to Find A Gift For Dad For Father's Day

How to Invest in Frontier Communications and/or Verizon

How to Know If Your House Contains FES2 Toxic Chinese Drywall

How to Make A Boston Cream Pie Martini

How to Walk Across America With Ruby

How to Protect A Yard From Mosquitoes

How to Test If Your 4th of July Barbeque Is Done

How to Keep Deer Out Of A Garden

How to Get Rid Of A Splinter

How to Save Money By Using Coupons

How to Save Money By Mixing Cosmetics

How to Pack A Weekend Travel Bag

How to Use A Spoon To Peel A Hard Boiled Egg

How to Create A Focal Point In A Garden

How to Get A Dog To Lose Weight

How to Play Poker - Indian Style

How to Stay Current In The Job Market

How to Find a Lost Pet Quickly

How to Tell A Female Blue Crab From a Male Crab

How to Prepare Food For A Crab Feast

How to Set A Table For A Crab Feast

How to Measure a Chesapeake Bay Blue Crab

How to Order A Chesapeake Bay Blue Crab Feast Online

Ah, spring flowers...

Spent most of today outside planting loads of pots with fresh herbs, some flowers, and rearranging such until Mom and I were just DONE with it. I need help rearranging stuff - Gert is better than I am but neither of us is Martha Stewart... We're not even Joan Rivers - although we're closer on that one...

Found out today that an age-old friend whom I recently reconnected with on Facebook is throwing out the first ball at an Orioles game in May so, of course, I just can't miss this opportunity! John and I are both looking forward to seeing Liz, aka Boom Boom, and probably making fun of her like I did - well, a long, long, LONG time ago... I'm trying to lose 40 lbs between now and then... Either that or invest in a good body stocking....

Speaking of needing a body stocking...

Sophia came over tonight with loads of chinese food for dinner so the three of us feasted. I bought some unknown green at the local chinese market earlier today and tried a new recipe I found on the internet - note to self; don't do that again. This chinese market just sucks me in though as the produce is so fresh and about 1/2 the price of the local Giant.

John and his Dad turned over a pretty large plot of land for me to make a garden. Sophia has requested tomatoes, red chili peppers, and green beans. In addition, I'll plant zucchini, yellow squash, cucumbers and green peppers. Am looking forward to just going out back and getting fresh veggies this summer. Also put some arugula out today in pots - love that stuff!

Killian was antsy tonight so took him out back with a frisbee and made him run for it. He got some pretty spectacular catches in and made 8 out of 10. Pretty amazing dog.

On making new friends....

So, with the world rapidly becoming larger due to the ability to connect with others on the internet, I've made some amazing 'friends' (whom I probably will never meet).

This morning, I sat down in the livingroom, sipped a cup of coffee, ruminated on the fact that DC is in the midst of the largest snowstorm this year (and I'm driving tomorrow!). I turned on the PC and headed over to eHow to catch up for the day. I found this wonderful tribute in my inbox - this is from an eHow friend named Susan Golis:

"My mom lived with me, the last year of her life she was 90 when she passed away. I loved her living with me, we would play cards, and watch TV, go shopping, talk, laugh, plan menu's, plant flowers, we were more like friends than mother and daughter. Sometimes I would fall asleep on the sofa next to her, and awake with her asleep too...she would be holding my hand. Treasure the moments that you have with your mom...."

It's quite heartwarming to run across people such as Susan on the internet. I've 'met' other eHowers who also leave me nice messages and share their experiences with their own aging parents. What a surprisingly nice support group - one that I never even considered when I started playing around with writing articles again.

Here's a link to Susan's articles - go up there and peruse some of them - they're quite good:
http://www.ehow.com/members/Susang6-articles.html

And, here's my latest, greatest -
How to Save Money With Vacuum Sealers

Oh, I made a grand total of $14.27 last month (double the previous month). So, I have a total of $22.07 to spend on something for John's new boat - I'm figuring it's a bottle of wine and 2 candy bars....

Snow is falling and it's gorgeous out - we have probably 4-5 inches at the house here. The dogs were running like crazy around the backyard - I swear I can sometimes hear them laughing.

We also have a new occupant here a the OK Corral - 'Jim Beam' (aka 'JB') the cat joined our crew last month. It took me only about 2 weeks to fully acclimate him to the dogs - he's running around the house right now keeping the mice away - haven't seen a mouse since he came in so it's working. He's quite a nice cat and quite BIG, weighing in somewhere around the 20 lb mark. He's got Rita beat by a mile.

JB is FIV positive which equates, sadly, to Feline Aids. He's probably around 5 or so and quite healthy at the moment. I found him when a dear friend of mine (Nan) knew about his situation. Nan is also the one who hooked me up with The Paw Pad where we got dear wee Rita from.

Anyway, JB was being cared for by a wonderful woman (Amy) and her husband down in Fairfax. He was homeless but, thankfully, Amy cared for him with food. Her dogs are cat-agressive so JB hung out mostly on her porch, awaiting any human contact. He's affectionate-hungry and loves to sit in my lap, curl up into a large ball, bury his head under my arm and drift off to sleep. Quite a change for a cat who once was chewed up and spit out by a pit bull. It's amazing to me that, given his background, he adapted so quickly to the dogs. In fact, this cat is much more dog than cat - he follows me everywhere.

Did I mention that JB is LARGE? He loves to eat. Here he is drinking some milk while the dogs scarf up breakfast.

JB will remain an indoor cat as long as we're in this house - I cannot handle the heartbreak of killing yet another cat. At last sight, he doesn't appear to mind a bit - he's curled up on his bed sound asleep, safe, well fed, and warm.

Here's the eHow I wrote about acclimating JB to the dogs - of course, when I wrote this eHow, I had NO clue how to acclimate a cat. I just did what made sense and it seems to have worked. Who knew?!

It might not look like much to you...

...but it's a sure sign of love to me. I was running around all over town yesterday and came home to find that Mom had unloaded the dishwasher for me. Now, I know this doesn't sound like 'all that' but, trust me, it is. When her hands hurt so much in the morning that she can't feel the handle of her coffee cup or grasp the spoon for sugar, laborously unloading the dishwasher is a huge sign of love as she knows it's the one thing I hate doing, above anything else in the house. For some reason, I have no problem loading the thing, I just hate hate hate unloading it. It's these little things that Mom continues to do for me that are just so wonderful. She got a fresh batch of oatmeal/raisin cookies (served with a glass of milk) for a snack yesterday.

A few weeks ago, we had snow. I was going out to the mailbox (about 60 feet from the house) to get her newspaper in the morning. As I opened the door, she yelled 'Wear your shoes!' Of course, I had NO intention of wearing my shoes as it was a balmy 37 degrees out and I was only going so far and, after all, I am 50! FIFTY!!! I just looked at her. Her reply was 'I'm still your Mother' - cracked me up.

I believe we've hit on what appears to be a good sleep-aid for her - I've been giving her a tylenol with codeine about 1.5 hours before she goes to bed and takes a sleeping pill. The tylenol gives her enough relief from her knee arthritis pain and, mixing with the sleeping pill, keeps her from waking up as much during the night. She's much brighter in the morning - and, yes, I checked this protocol with her nurse practitioner. Since her age is 92, Mom, me and the nurse practitioner are all on the same wavelength with 'do whatever works.' So, we just tottle along, doing whatever works.

I've been assisting in the dog obedience class on Saturdays and have been just having a blast doing it. Too bad there's no money to be made in dog training. It's really great to be surrounded by pups on a Saturday morning - of course, I get that here everyday!

I'm also starting back up with some pottery classes in the beginning of March. Watch out, Vic - there will be some more crap - er, fine pottery pieces - coming your way. Victoria just LOVES my rejects, and I will admit that I get a kick out of seeing them all in use when I visit her lovely home down by Solomon's Island. I'm sure she runs around putting them all out when she knows I'm on my way but, hey, I'm easy - I don't care.

I continue to play around with eHow articles - I'm up to 77 so far. Mom and I have a lot of fun coming up with these. Here's the latest and greatest (?):

How to Make Juicy Hamburgers On a Budget

How to Make Extra Money by Panning For Gold In Battle Mountain, Nevada

How to Buy A Gift For A Dog Lover

How to Stock Your Pantry

How to Cure Your Dog's Separation Anxiety

How to Save Money On Your Pet's Medications

Oh, Holly? I've made almost $2 on the Data Management article. Totally cracks me up!

Oh, regarding that shoe story earlier? I wore them...

Presidents of the US

Mom and I are watching the Inauguration festivities in Washington and were talking about how many presidents she's seen in her lifetime: 17! She has lived through 17 U.S. presidents. Somehow, this amazes me.

The first one she remembers is Roosevelt. She says:

'Everyone loved him. He had fireside chats. Everyone hurried home to hear him because they really did like him. He had a wonderful voice - a very soft voice.'

She also remembers Truman. She says:

'Dad always said that he was a very good friend of Israel.'

Nixon? Of course everyone remembers him. I was 15 and at a party at Don Beckstead's house, watching tv when he resigned.

Both Mom and I are hoping that Obama continues the path he's laid to connect with the American people. We need and deserve just that.

Snow abounds today. We've got the fireplace roaring at the moment. Vet visit for wee Rita and Hops drained my wallet a fair amount. Hops, having 3 legs is starting to slow down just a bit - of course, he's almost 11 these days and muscle tenderness is setting in. Vet says there's not much arthritis (excellent news), so he's on muscle relaxants for 30 days to see if that speeds him up a bit in the morning. One problem is that this old farmhouse is mostly hardwood floors which is tough on Hops but, if I put more throw rugs down, it's tough on Mom. Not a toss up at all - Mom wins which means that Hops will just have to continue to slide around. But, whatever happens in the future, I think he's had a very rich, very wonderful life since being adopted at 11 months. He's quite the lover and, by far, my sweetest dog. I'll miss him greatly one day, but, for the moment, he's here, happy, and we should have years to go yet before he rests. He is, however, on a diet.....he's at 45 lbs (now, mind you, remember, this is just 3/4 of a dog as he's minus a leg...). I've been instructed by the vet to bring him down to 39 lbs or so which really shouldn't be a problem since I've, in turn, instructed dear Gert to STOP feeding him! She pouted a bit but she'll get over it.

We were watching Oprah a moment ago and noted that Joe Biden's mother is younger than Mom. She's 91. I figure that, if I had bundled Mom up, we probably could have gotten tickets - dammit!

Reunion time

Well, it’s been a very busy few days around here. I dropped Mom off for a visit and dinner at Ron’s Thursday night while I went to a reunion party of my old ‘gang.’ Now, we were a ‘gang’ of kids before ‘gang’ was a bad thing. We’d play flag football in the median strip (when there was a median strip!) of Norbeck road when Norbeck was 2 lanes. We’d get together at someone’s house to watch tv or have impromptu parties in the summer. We’d put on the latest music (generally Bobby Sherman or, if we were feeling adventuresome, the Stones) and dance, dance, dance. We’d make up line dances before we knew that they’d one day be popular. And, that Hustle dance? We were all about getting those moves just right! I believe it might have been Mike who even had a white suit but not sure about that…

We had the childhood that others dream of – loads of fun. I don’t ever remember complaining that there was ‘nothing to do’ and we weren’t inside watching tv either. We’d play kickball in the court where I lived and late summer nights would find me and 3 or 4 friends sitting in the gazebo in the court where I lived, sipping an illegal beer (that’s about the extent of our rebellion back then). We’d sit on the transformer in front of Robin’s house and watch the cars go by. Or lie on our backs in the grass and watch the clouds float by.

So, after 32 years, it was time to see some of these people again. Most of the core group showed – Robin, Sharon, Mike, Don, Tom, Janet, Andi, Howie and me – some of them toting significant others, some coming stag or toting their kids.

It’s always interesting to me to see how similar the kids are to the parents. Janet and Tom's baby (who is 15!) looks just like Janet at that age. Very fun to see - almost like being in a time warp. I spent a fair amount of time goofing off with her.

I looked over one time and saw Sharon and Robin viewing old pictures. I love the granny glasses on both! This is the synopsis of the party. We all are certainly aging (that goes without saying) but, in the end, we're all pretty much the same people we were before - only with granny glasses.

John and I saw some gorgeous fireworks on the way home – big bonus to being out late on July 3. All in all, a nice time was had by all.

Tale of the folks marriage

My friend, Judy, asked me in an early comment to this blog, to document the tale of my folks marriage. I sat down this morning with the computer and just typed the words that mom said when I asked her to tell me the story. Here are her words - note; sorry about the quality of the pictures - I didn't want to take them out of the frames and just took pictures of the pictures):

My brother, Al, introduced us when Joe needed a date for a hayride on a Sunday. My brother said ‘My sister is coming in Sunday to visit me. You might ask her.’

Joe said ‘Is she cute?’

Al replied ‘Hell no she’s not cute. But you’ll have a good time with her’ and we’ve had a good time ever since.

We dated 5 years and it was dating, nothing more. I told him I either want to get married or I was going to visit my sister in Seattle where she had plans for me. She was probably going to introduce me to someone to marry because she was an orthodox jew. She was going to be a Yenta.

In the spring, I told him I was leaving shortly for Seattle, Washington. He said he was coming to Kansas City that night to see me, and he took the next train out from Witchita, Kansas where he lived at the time. He said he didn’t want to lose me and let’s get married.

We married June 15, 1941 in the synagogue. It was a Jewish custom back then to borrow a ring for the marriage because no one had any money to buy a ring. I was married with my mother-in-laws ring. Joe bought it from her for, I think, $1.

My mother-in-law made supper for us after the wedding for just the family.

We honeymooned at Excelsior Springs in North Kansas City (45 minutes away from the house). We borrowed my father-in-laws car as we didn’t have one. I was 25, Joe was 24.

Joe’s folks didn’t want him to get married as he would be marrying before his older sisters and, in those days, that was a no-no.

So, those are Gert’s words of the start of her marriage. Here’s mine:

An interesting side line of the story is that my Uncle Al, who introduced them, moved to California while my folks settled in DC. Traveling back and forth across the country just didn’t happen back in those days so my folks and Uncle Al didn’t see each other until the folks flew to California on the way to Hawaii to celebrate their 25th anniversary.

Uncle Al met them at the airport with the now famous line of ‘Man, Joe, you hold a grudge!’

My parents enjoyed 65 and 1/2 years of the most wonderful marriage I’ve ever seen or heard of. They were (and still are) ‘Gertie and Joe.’ Although Dad is now physically gone, they are still one entity.

Here’s one of the stories I told in the eulogy I gave for my dad – it’s one of my favorite memories of my two ‘twins.’

I remember one time, I was visiting them in Arizona, lying in the back bedroom about to go to bed. Dad was watching the news on the big tv in the living room, Mom went into their bedroom to watch another channel. I heard Dad turn off his tv and go into the bedroom. Then, I heard the sound of – what’s this? – arguing! I thought ‘Hot diggity! A heated argument! Better listen in!’ I hardly ever heard them bicker. This ‘argument’ though was amazing to hear. Dad had turned off the tv in the living room and gone into the bedroom where Mom switched channels to what he had been watching. He was arguing with her about her turning the channel to what he wanted to see! He said that she should watch what she wanted. She said she didn’t care - they’d watch what he wanted. They were arguing about who was the less selfish.

That was the story of their life – he thought about her first and foremost, and, in turn, she thought about him first and foremost. That was one secret to their 65 1/2 year happy marriage.

Their love was based on respect, honor, and gratitude that they had each other in their lives. Dad had bypass surgery when he was 65. The doctors estimated his life span at another 10 years. He lived another very full 24 years, and I have no doubt at all that he lived those years due to the love he shared with my darling mother.

On grilling and such

Well, got my birthday present from Mom delivered yesterday - a totally kick-ass grill! OMG! This thing is just amazing. I have to get my propane tank updated to handle the additional power it requires but, man o' man, that sucker turns out some hot dogs! More on dinner later.

Jeff, Mom and I took John's dog, Matee, to the vet over in Laurel yesterday. Pretty funny as it took 3 adults to handle a 13.6 lb pug but, trust me here, it did! She climbed up my shoulder, grabbed my neck with 2 paws and would not let go. Mom, Jeff and I tried to soothe her but she was not having it. Mom left the room at one point and returned with a new chew toy which had a softening effect on her but she was still very wary of where she was. Funny dog.

Stopped by Town Hall on the way home to say hi to brother Ron and get a pretty hefty liquor order for the Mansion East and Mansion West. Bought nice bottles of Scotch and Bourbon which John and I enjoyed later in the hot tub - something tells me those bottles won't see the Mansion West.

Evening time found us breaking in the new grill. Sophia, John, Jeff, Mom and I had an impromptu barbeque with hot dogs (Nathan's by request), grilled asparagus and red onions, and grilled potatoes on that spankin' new grill.

At one point, I was standing in front of the grill and watched a hot dog roll around under its own power - just rolling to and fro. Fairly strange occurrence until it dawned on me what was happening - I just knew it was Dad moving that dog around as he was a total hot dog man. After I'd make dinner on the charcoal grill at the cabin, he'd always say:



'You know what would be good on those coals now?'

Of course, I knew the answer but, with a slight grin, a twinkling blue eye and askance in his voice, he'd say:

'A hot dog?'

Of course, I'd always make him one or two for 'dessert' and he would just lick his lips as they were sizzling on the fire. I never saw him enjoy eating more than when he was chewing on a grilled hot dog - although, he definitely perked up every time he saw Sophia arrive toting homemade chinese food (Mom and Dad both said that Sophia ruined dining out at Chinese restaurants for them - no one makes chinese like dear Sophia!).


Anyway, I definitely felt Joey standing behind me last night, looking over my shoulder at that grill as that hot dog moved around under its own power. Mom and I shared a few smiles over that. His physical presence is well missed but he's always right here with us. Mom and I speak of him frequently, bringing John up to speed about who Joe was. Mom and I both feel him here with us. That's nice.

I had a request to impart to the blog readers a story of how the folks met. I plan on getting the details from Mom today and posting tomorrow (although I know the story by heart myself, I'll type what she says). She's such a gem.