Key West Travels (and Travails)

My friend Robin, whom I've known since I was 10 (she'll say 11 but she's older than me and can't remember things as well as I can...) headed down to Key West last Saturday for a getaway. We both needed it - me taking care of Mom and Robin having all types of family problems. Her big brother, Doug, just died recently and she's dealing with that. And, the poor thing has now lost 3 siblings...life is not fair.

Anyway, the idea of the trip was first broached when John decided to take Kenny (his brother) and his mom and dad on a weeklong cruise. So, they booked it with the first port Key West. Woohoo! Right up my alley. I'm always happy to head back home! So, I asked Robin to come along and we booked Key West for the weekend so we'd have a few days, ostensibly meet John's ship for the day and hang around town, he'd go his way, Rob and I would come home. Ah, but, the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Now, Robin and my plan went off without a hitch. We got to KW on Saturday, went over to a great place called Louie's Backyard which is off the beaten path but right on the water. Sat at the bar and had a glass of wine and a really good salmon crostini appetizer (that's a must-get-again if ever there). We waddled back into town, bar hopped a bit and end of day 1.

Day 2 found us pretty much doing the same thing as Day 1 except I went earring shopping happy - 5 pairs, can you believe it?! Yep, well, 6 pairs if you count the little silver pair I bought early in the day for a few bucks. Anyway, Robin and I did about every store (and a few bars) imaginable. Nightfall found us down at Sunset Pier for the Sunset Celebration which was a great time. We then headed to a place Robin had heard of called Better Than Sex. Now, this is a dessert place off Petronia (for those Key West saavy folks) and, the place is justly named (for some ). Better Than Sex specializes in after dinner fare, such as chocolate rimmed dessert wines, ports mixed with raspberry and this chocolate thing that we got that was incredibly good. The place is very dark, lit only with red candles. We sat at the bar and oogled the darling bartender who played up to the crowd. There were 5 ladies at the bar which should tell you how darling the bartender was. We played a couple of rounds of 'who'd you rather' with the other ladies and had a lot of laughs. End of day 2.

Now it gets interesting:

Day 3 what when John's cruise was to port in Key West. Robin and I got up, showered and dressed as we wanted to see the boat port. Well, we were at the port at 7:30 (after picking up an excellent Cuban coffee). It was fairly cool out (60s) and VERY WINDY! Here comes the interesting part. In the picture posted, see that boat out there? Doesn't really look like it's coming in to dock, does it? Well, it DIDN'T! Nope, it was too windy for it to dock so Key West closed its port to a total of 3 cruise ships for the day. John called and, when I asked him where he was (thinking maybe I was wrong and he docked somewhere else on the island - a fleeting thought with an island 2x4 miles and a boat nearly as long...). But, forever hopeful, I asked him where he was and the reply? 30 miles south of Key West. Shoot. Darn. Damn. Ah, oh well....

So, Monday found Robin and me waddling around as before but having a great time nonetheless. We ended up at one of the seedy male review shows after a few too many cocktails and then waddled our way home.

Tuesday went as planned and we returned home to DC. The trip though was a success. It was a lot of fun just reconnecting with an old friend. Robin and I hadn't traveled together since we were 18 or so (let's see, um, 10 years ago? Yeah, right...). We laughed a lot, we cried a bit - all in all, another wonderful weekend in the Keys.

Another glorious Key West weekend.

The house kitty (hated fish - go figure)

John and I had possibly the best time yet in Key West on this past trip - albeit, an expensive one! And, we thought this trip was going to be cheap! Well, it would have been if not for a few nice purchases...

Flew all the way in this time - view of 7 mile bridge

Found yet another very cheap airflight so took them up on it and flew all the way in. 4 short hours later, we were standing at our hotel off Duvall. We stayed at a new place for us, Hollinsted house, which was just delightful. Just a block off Duvall in the 600 block (half way between island ends), the house is made up of a variety of condos, some of which are simply devine.If you're going to Key West anytime soon, email me and I'll hook you up with Tracey, the owner of a few of the condos there. Got a great deal all the way around. The cat above is the house kitty, or so we thought. She appeared magically out of the bushes, usually yawning and looking for affection. She made JB look like a GIANT, which, of course, he is.

We walked the streets a lot this trip and even rented a little two person electric car in which to tool around for a day. Took us down some paths we'd not found earlier as we discussed where we'll be living one day. Met some great locals - 2 stand out in our minds. Houston and Suzie are both 5th generation (!) Conchs - born and raised in KW. Talked to them for quite a while. Houston's 87 year old mom lives next door and sounds like she's the opposite of my Mom. Houston was telling us some great tales about her complaints, etc, as she's a very crotchety old woman. I shared tales of my delightful Mother. I sure wish I could talk mom into moving to KW with me NOW but that ain't happening. Ah well, it will happen one day but I'm not rushing the future.

No, it's a LIVE rooster!

John and I decided to rent a boat again this trip and go looking for dolphins - no luck. We needed Bobbi, the official dolphin spotter with us. The ocean was rockier than last time we went out but we didn't really care. We headed out to the reef and moored up for an afternoon of conversation, cocktails and a few quick swims.

Tried a few really nice restaurants this time around. One of the great things about staying in a different part of the island is that we explored instead of going to the same old rounds we usually do. Sarabeth's owner, David, was a wonderful guy and, although dinner was good, we're thinking breakfast is even better. The last night there, we went to Cafe Marquesa which was probably the best restaurant I've ever been to, period. But, you'll pay for it too. The ambiance is great, food was outstanding, and the whole dining experience was worth the price.

Ah, but, as the saying goes, all good things must come to an end so we flew home after just 3 days in paradise. But, the end of this trip starts the countdown to the next one which is already on the books. We'll be in Key West 4 times this year, which seems about right to us...

Love this shot!

I'm struck by how lucky I am

Ah, technology...

So, John hooked up a wireless connection between my computer and the big screen tv so I can now easily show Mom pictures and articles that people send over to show her. Went through and showed her pictures that I have categorizes as she and Dad. Ran across a few fun ones which I'll post here.

Mom and Rita always seem to have a connection

Not bad for a woman who didn't use to like dogs

Pic from the Beach house this summer

Gert and Gizmo have a fan club too

Red hats gave us much amusement

Rita is always an attentive listener..as is Gert

On other recent news, John, Mom and I went to see the Cirque de Soliel show here at National Harbor a few weeks ago. Amazing show although the first half was better than the second. We got handicapped parking which was great, wheeled her in, got her a beer and settled in the first row of the second tier. Wonderful seats to watch the show. They do such amazing stuff, it's hard to follow! My favorite part was this wormy thing that I really couldn't understand at all. It was, evidently, a single person inside this wormy suit and the thing moved in amazing ways. If you get a chance, catch the show. It's Ovo.

Love that Key West trip!

Getting ready to head to Key West this weekend for some much needed R&R. Supposed to be a wonderful weekend, weather-wise, and John and I will probably get a boat again as we had such a great time doing that in August. We're just going for a long weekend but the prices for flights all the way down can't be beat right now - $157 roundtrip out of Baltimore. Got another trip lined up for December and looking to plan KW in February next. We're rapidly adopting the island as our second home base which works well with the plan of retirement.

Here's the latest writings on the internet:


Top 5 Worst Places to Make Money Online

Top 5 Items to Include In a Soldier Care Package

Top 5 Symptoms of a Stroke

Top 5 Ann Rule Books

Top 5 Things That Should NOT Be Posted on Facebook

Top 5 Board Games

Top 5 Stupid Gestures   

Flintstones Characters

 

Cabin weekend

As I go about updating the blog, I was looking through pictures to trigger my memory of what we've done this summer. Turns out, we were sort of movers and shakers this summer - well, John and I were at least. Gert was more of a sitter. But, had a beautiful summer with many weekends spent on sailing or on the jet ski and a few very nice weekends at the cabin.

More pictures from Key West...

I forgot my gorgeous new Nikon D5000 on the dining room table when I headed to the Keys so was lax in getting pictures. But, the below are a few samplings from phone pics (gotta love those Blackberries) and a few assorted cameras sent around to capture the moments.

One of my favorite ever pics of Sharyn. I'm so grateful for my good friends. And even more grateful that my good friends love each other. Sharyn and John have their own fan club ....

And then there's gorgeo
us Bobbi who I've finally started to listen to..

Key West Weekend!

Well, John and I were at it again - headed down to Key West in August, this time for Bobbi's birthday. Sharyn came along and a spectacular time was had by all. In fact, this may have been the best trip to Key West yet.

It started with John and I picking up Sharyn at the airport just one hour after we arrived. Perfect timing! Loaded up the car and hit the road for what has become one of our favorite rides ever. John and I have a ritual on the ride; we stop at a liquor store right outside Miami for Key West supplies, then head down the road for 70 miles to a favorite bar. This time though, we hit the liquor store and then just beat feet for Key West where Bobbi was waiting.

Of course, no birthday party in Key West is complete without accoutraments such as martini glasses (no, really, martini sunglasses), tiaras (one for each girl and a King hat for the boy), leis, bubbles, and a host of other toys. So, Sharyn, John and I met Bobbi in our party rigalia and the day was ON!

After a quick fresh up at our hotel (marvelous place BTW - Key West Harbor Inn), we waddled over to start our tour. And tour we did! We hit about every bar, laughing like idiots on every street corner. OMG. We had SO much fun. But that ain't nothin...

The next day, John and I decided we wanted to get a boat and go out to the reef. So, after getting more provisions, Sharyn, Bobbi, Skipper John and Mate Lori loaded onto a 23 foot bow runner complete with snorkel gear and a cooler - couldn't ask for more. Well, we could have but it probably would have been illegal. Anyway, off we went to the reef. The boat ride couldn't have been any more wonderful as the seas were as laid down as I've ever seen them.

We moored the boat and hopped in for a nice swim in crystal blue seas of 30 feet. We swam, we partied, we laughed. In all, we spent 4 hours at the reef even though we'd rented the boat for 8 hours.Snorkeled, had cocktails, snorkeled some more. Bobbi, who was to become knows as the official dolphin spotter spotted two beauties about 500 feet off. It was a magnificent moment and my first time seeing wild dolphins. What an awe inspiring experience.

And, this was the FIRST martini!

But, even for us, 8 hours was a long time at the reef so we headed back in early. As we docked the boat, I asked the guy, also John, who rented it to us if I could get a small refund since we weren't out 8 hours. He said 'no' but, instead, he'd give it to us for another day! Holy crap! Really? REALLY! He and John had struck up a conversation earlier as he spotted John's marine tattoo and this guy was also ex marine. There's definitely a brotherhood among marines so John's service to the country netted us a nice benefit (besides freedom, of course...).

So, that night, much merriment was had, many key lime martinis were drunk, and 4 drunks wandered the streets.

The next morning (credit Lori) we borrowed some floating noodles from the hotel pool and loaded the boat up again. Headed out on glass smooth seas to the reef where we mixed up libations, tied the noodles to the boat and hopped in. Bobbi and I were the first 2 in and it was great until we saw the shark...yep, about 14 feet away. A great white, I'm sure. It must have been 10 feet long (read: 3 feet if you stretched it and probably a non-human eating nurse shark) with gaping jaws (it might have been sleeping), steaming right toward Ms. Lowe and me (lazing around the bottom eating sand...). Anyway, Bobbi and I might have won some sort of championship if there was one for getting on a boat the fastest. Now, we left John behind and he was ok with that and, as I recall, even made fun of us until he screamed like a girl when he saw the barracuda. Talk about walking on water. We had a new prophet among us.

My tiara wasn't nearly as nice as Ms. Lowe's but mine lit up!

After a few boatbound coctails, we all got our nerve back and decided that the recipe to not being scared was simply to not look down. Worked like a champ. We had the most amazing time bobbing around the ocean in 30 feet of water, not looking down. I think this second day on the reef was my single best day on vacation ever. And, I mean, ever by a mile! It was just an amazing time. Floating in 85 degree water, surrounded by dolphins swimming, the best of friends and laughter. OMG - did we laugh. I think this was also Bobbi's single most funniest ever. Every thing she said had us all howling. We must have sounded like idiots to the people sandwiched like sardines on the dive boat and we were definitely the people to know in Key West.

On the way back from the reef, we spotted a boat anchored and 3 people standing (STANDING) in ankle deep water, 7 miles off shore from Key West. Well, of course, we had to stand on the sand bar too. What a blast.

One big sangria!

 

Nightfall found us wandering the streets again but nothing could top the type of day we had. If any readers ever go to Key West and have boating skills, you must take out your own boat. Unlike anything I've ever experienced.

Monday found Sharyn, John and I leaving Key West to wander back up to Ft. Lauderdale. We stayed at Pelican Cove, right on the ocean for the night before loading up for the ride to Ft. Lauderdale in the morning and the flight home.

So, home we came but not without future fun trips to Key West. John and I are headed back to our second home next week for just the weekend and then again in December. 4 trips to Key West a year feels about right (unless we can work 6 in!).

More pics will follow once I weed through my pictures to find them. And,as promised, here's a few links for your reading enjoyment if you choose:

How to save money in Key West, Florida
How to keep your cool in hot weather

More tales from the Bay house vacation

I'm afraid I got caught up in daily life and have been remiss in documenting the rest of our vacation to the Bay house.

After my brothers and their families left and there was just Bobbi, John, Sharyn, Gert and me, we decided to head down to the casino to try our luck (more like try Mom's luck).

So, we bellied on up to a casino slot machine after, of course, stopping for a cocktail at the outdoor bar - no sense wasting a perfectly good happy hour. Anyway, Mom split a $100 into 5 twenties and found a machine that was, of course, the farthest away from the aisle as she could get, thereby making it quite a challenge to get her back there. Sans wheelchair but avec the will to gamble, she tottled over to her machine supported on all sides by her entourage. I'm certain that the other gamblers must have thought she was famous, the way all of us were buzzing around her. The truth was we wanted to make sure she didn't fall and thereby blow the rest of our vacation!\

Anyway, she put $20 in the machine, and, after a short primer by me about how to hit the buttons, etc, she was off. And, man, OFF SHE WAS. Here's her very first pull on the machine:

 Now, this was a pretty damned good start and the key to gambling is to leave a winner so, of course, we stayed. After all, if that was the first pull, what would be the second? Long story short, she ended up walking out with $60 some bucks up - enough to treat to the next round. Sharyn and I didn't do nearly as well, in fact, I'm not sure either of us cashed out! Oh well...that's what money is for. Bobbi and John, wisely, decided to hold onto their dollars so they walked out winners in their own rights.

It was interesting to me to watch her gambling response increase. At first, I had to work with her to help her with the hands and drawing to the 5 card draw game but, after about 5 minutes, she was seeing hands that I was missing. The gambling spirit is well and alive within Gert.

He said to me 'WTF! I was only getting gas!'

On day 3 of our Bay vacation, John decided to take the jet ski over to Tilghman Island, ostensibly, to gas it up. Of course, the Rod And Reel Marina was a short jet ski 5 minutes away and has gas pumps aplenty but John must have conveniently forgotten about that or, perhaps, he just wanted to battle the bay for the 12 miles to Tilghman. Wouldn't have been a problem if, well, he didn't need to stop for gas.

So, on the way across the bay, John reports that the waves were 2-3 feet with wild swells. He was having a blast, jumping from one top to another, catching air and loving life. Having been a pro at riding (and wiping out) on dirt bikes during his youth, riding the jet ski brought back some of his skills (or lack thereof) from days of yore. The guy also has a cat's 9 lives and generally lands on his feet (most times). Anyway, he said he had a wonderful time on the ride over and back and came home, safe and sound. But, something was amiss. I wasn't sure what it was but something was rotten in Denmark.

Let me set the scene:

Lori (lying in bed, reading a book, relaxing)
John  (enters room and flops on bed. Lori gets slightly wet from the impact and wonders why he's so wet)
Lori (looks at John and detects that 'I ate a canary look' - believe she saw 3 yellow feathers sticking to his beard).
Lori: 'Hi, honey.' 'How was your ride?'
John: 'Oh, it was GREAT, waves were 2-3 feet in the middle, got to Tilghman in 30 minutes. It was a great time.' (insert pregnant pause)
Lori (recognizes a pregnant pause when she hears one but stays quiet and allows the pregnancy to bloom. Finally, she's waited long enough and peers at John quizzically)
John: 'Well, there's something I need to tell you but I don't want to...'
Lori (glances quickly outside and sees the jet ski on the lift. No crunches or untoward effects from this latest ride seen. Glances back at John to do a quick appraisal - bruise on foot, same as this morning. Broken toe, same as this morning. Assorted bumps and bruises on arms, same as this morning. Bruise on ego? New...)

And, so the tale starts:


John did, indeed, make it to Tilghman after playing in the bay, hopping too and fro. He was tied up to the gas pump at Tilghman ready to hop onto the dock and gas up when a fairly large boat went by (remember; this is John's tale - it could have been a duck for all I know.).

Anyway, he reports that this h-u-g-e ship went by (in the no wake zone, by the way - no wake means there's no waves allowed. 6 knots is the maximum speed. A wave created from a boat going 6 knots is about the same as a child jumping in a swimming pool - and not off the high dive. It's more like stepping off of the last step in the shallow end....).

Anyway, the next thing he knew, he was in the drink! Boop! Gone. Right over the side of the ski while TIED TO THE DOCK. Now, in my book, this one beats my dump into the harbor or even Bobbi's less than ceremonious slide at Herrington Harbor South - after all he was TIED TO THE DOCK. The slight no wake wiggle of water was enough to send that cat a sailing.

I was just holding my sides when I managed to choke out 'Did anybody see?' 'No' was the too quick answer and might have slid by a less astute listener but after a slight second, I decided I just couldn't let this go! 'Wait a minute!' I choked out - 'What about the people on the boat? They must have seen.'

With a harumph and a hurt look in those baby blues he said 'Well, I didn't see the people so it doesn't count...'

And, in fine fashion, after I stopped laughing, I documented the tale in a picture as, we all know, dear readers, a picture is worth a thousand words (I'm thinking I should become an artist instead of an author..):

So, that capped off Day 3, onto Day 4.

Kim came down for the day to visit and we had a nice time with some cocktails on the deck. John decided to go for a jet ski ride and asked Bobbi if she wanted to go (now, when my friend Bobbi lost her mind is beyond me). She was still quite sore from our crash 2 days prior. I couldn't believe she's set sail on the jet ski again after our spill of Titanic proportions. But, cocktails make one do strange things.. So, off they bobbled.

The bay wasn't particularly stormy - probably 1 to 2 foot waves. Nothing to worry about though and, we now know that the jet ski was gassed up so we're safe on that front. John and Bobbi should, theoretically, have come back as dry as when I sent them off. But, ah, that's what the tale's about.

John dropped her off the back of the jet ski, not once, but twice! The first time, they hit a wake of a boat - nothing like Ron's boat but enough to send Bobbi back off the left side of the ski again. The second time, she was smart and hung on so tightly to John that she pulled him off with her - smart move. It's best to teach a lesson early on - I go in, you go in.

On the second spill, they said they kind of slid gracefully off the ski which is still a bonus from our previous crashes. And, Bobbi said, this time, unlike the other dives in the drink, she went off the right side of the ski. She said she liked the left side better.

So, at the moment, with my one spill, I'm ahead of the game. The record is Lori: 1, John: 3; Bobbi: 3, oh, and Kimmie? 1. John dropped her too - talk about not being trusted! I think we should get a bigger boat...

I yelled 'I got this!' (aka - shoot. I lost my shoe)

So, for those following readers who saw my post where John fell off the jet ski (with much aplomb), I'm guessing you'll see where we're headed with this post.

So, yesterday, the first full day of vacation at the bay house started off promising, with calm seas and a light breeze. Bobbi and I decided to head off on the jet ski (bad decision #1) for a buzz of the Chesapeake beach and a run up to Harrington Harbor South where Ron's boat, the Bottom Line, is docked for the week. The plan was in full effect until we entered the harbor and went to pull up next to his boat. Now, for those jet ski neophytes, when one turns off the jet ski, one has absolutely no control of the craft, and I turned it off too far from the Bottom Line so we were coming in a too fast and rapidly approaching its towering hull. So, I made the executive decision to sacrifice my dignity and hit the drink to keep the two items from a certain colllision. My decision might have been different if the jet ski was white and matched the hull of the Bottom Line, I might have risked a slight bump which Ron certainly wouldn't have even felt within the cushioney confines of his ship but the jet ski, alas, is red and I didn't want a spec of red paint adorning that mammoth hull. So, in I slithered, much to the amusement of all onlookers. Lucy and Ethel were firmly in the show.

And that wasn't nothin...

So, I made my undigified climb back onto the jet ski. Bobbi was sitting sidesaddle (she's such a girl) and, at one point. started to slip off backward. She was hanging onto the ski, but there was a very real possibility that she was going to flip us (and I had just climbed out..), and we weren't even moving. So, I yelled 'get off. Get Off. GET OFF!' with rising intensity, and, with that final pleading yell, I did what any good captain of a ship would do - I pushed her off. Yep, into the drink in the harbor she went. I will admit that my planned entrance had a bit more panache to it than her rather ineloquent 'splash', but, again, that wasn't nothin.

So, here we both are, wet and thirsty and gratefully accepted the screwdrivers handed our way, once the people on the Bottom Line could stand up as their laughing fits subsided. One smartass yelled 'you guys are a hazard.' Yeah, no shit, Sherlock.

Anywho, the Bottom Line left with nary a wave - I don't think Ron wanted to know us at this point (a rather familiar stance) but Lucy and Ethel were still in the dock. It took us a good 5 minutes to get out of this huge slip. We were hanging onto ropes, pulling and tugging to try and get the ski into the right position before Lucy hit the gas. Ok on this one. A successful, if funny, disembarkation was obtained.

The Bottom Line was almost clearing the no wake zone by the time we pulled into the harbor and little Lori wanted to catch up and, well, that's not exactly true. Little Lori wanted to lap the Bottom Line on her little bitty jet ski. The Bottom Line was probably moving at 30 knots; eh, that's nothing on the jet ski. John and I had it up to 51 on the potomac but, dear readers, the potomac is still waters compared to a light chop on the bay yesterday. And the light chop wasn't about to be the problem.

So, we had a nice smooth ride inside the wake of the Bottom Line until Little Lori decided to make her move - yes! We were close enough to move outside the wake and pass the boat, that fancy beautiful boat was about to be placed asunder with a roaring jet ski. I even had a nice little wave planned as we zipped past. Well, I went to cross the wake, being the idiot I am, and didn't even think of the physics of water - the bigger the boat, the bigger the wake. And me with my college degree...

If a picture is worth a thousand words:

Well, through the first six footer wake wave, we gallantly clung to the rocking beast. I believe I heard expletives but that could have been inside my head.

The real problem was, when I hung on through that 6 foot monster wake, I hit the throttle and sped up the ski and that was all she wrote. Holy crap, Batman! We both went flying! Arms waving, legs splayed, tumbling with the greatest of ease (not). Over and over we sailed. I know I hit the water after at least a 6 foot drop!

Sputtering to the surface, the good captain I am (and any good captain should place their passengers well being ahead of theirs), yelled 'Damn! I lost my shoe!' Bobbi was just coming up and said with a totally incredulous tone - 'You lose your SHOE? You've lost your MIND!'' And we all know, a mind is a horrible thing to lose.

The jet ski, upon the initial approach to wave #2, had sped up with huge momentum so it ended up about 100 yards away. However, it stopped as the jet ski Gods planned, but someone had to go swimming for it. I looked with askance at Bobbi but decided not to even offer the possibility that she practice her breast stroke so off I went. By the time I had gotten to the jet ski, the Bottom Line had turned around to come check on funeral arrangements. Being fine, albeit a little sore, we suffered the laughs and gahuffs of the crew and climbed aboard the jet ski for the ride back home. And, thank you God, no further idiot moves were taken on the ride home. But, we both wanted OFF this Gilligan's Island tour.

Later that day, I almost fell off John's boat while docked in Herrington North, spewing a cup of red wine on his white boat. I couldn't be trusted to even be alone, so came back to this marvelous house and bellied up to the bar, never to leave the warm confines of the terra firma again. Or so I thought....

Later that day....

John took out his 4 in 1 boat (it sails, it's a sailboard, a high speed towable and something else). It was the first time he's sailboarded it and he would have been ok if he had allowed for the compression of air once it's cold (another physics lesson). He inflated said boat and headed out. He just didn't inflate it enough. Once the air inside the boat cooled from the bay water, the boat deflated enough to make it impossible to stand upon. Sharyn's son, Carl, was here and witnessed John's voyage - I think someone said he was headed to Cuba last time they saw him. So, being the dutiful significant other I am, I grungingly crawled onto the dreaded jet ski for a tour #2 of the bay to go retrieve him. As I was scanning the horizon, I was just a bit concerned until a kayaker waved me over. All he said was 'Are you looking for...', I laughed and said 'Yes.' He pointed me to a small beach where John and what was left of his ego was perched. It wasn't our day for the water.

We sure did have fun though I'm spending a lot of time making it up to dear Bobbi, who enchanted us all by showing us the large purple bruise forming on her butt. Even Mom was amazed at the multitudes of colors, swirls, and bumps.

Here's a few pictures from our journey so far. Niece Monya proved to the be the best guest ever by bringing all kinds of stuff with her - lox, bagels, cream cheese, popcorn, steaks, etc etc. She came down with a really delightful friend of hers (Laura) who was also a load of fun. Mike, Bea, Josh, and Becky are here from Arizona and Mom's really enjoying having them with her. Ron and Linda, and friend Sharyn who came up from NC round out the troups. Linda has also been amazing with putting together dinners and all types of delicious foods as I sit on my ass (just the way a vacation should be). Kimmie is visiting sometime this week so we're surrounded by love, laughter and friends. A great vacation and it's only day 2...

Update on outcome of the Cruise to Nowhere (literally).

So, I heard back from Vacations To Go, the booking agent I used to book the Cruise to Nowhere - unless you consider the sitting in the Baltimore port 'somewhere.' Anyway, they've agreed to return all of the cash outlaid on the cruise which we couldn't, quite sadly, take. I was impressed with the speed of their decision, having spent 3 sleepless nights kicking myself. But, in the end, as Bubie said, everything worked out the way it was supposed to. So, onward and upward to the Beach House in June, which, I'm confident, Mom will enjoy more anyway. She'll have access to a daily newspaper, a bayfront suite, gourmet dinners (as long as Sharyn is cooking), friends and family and a few dogs thrown in for good measure. John will bring the sailboat(s) down for some bay fun during the day, gambling in the evenings at the local casino, and happy hours at the neighborhood bar. Am getting excited already. Decided to not even unpack the suitcases...they'll just await the next trip.

A funny thing happened on the way to the cruise...

...or not. Depends on your point of view.

So, I spent at least 5 days making sure I had everything needed to keep Mom healthy and happy for our 7 day cruise on the Carnival Pride out of Baltimore. New clothes? Check. Medicines for 9 days (just in case)? Check. Ensure plus meal supplements? Check. The Mary Tyler Moore show, season 1? Check. Keeping Mom propped up mentally and physically until we sailed Sunday? Check (and exhausting). Ad nauseum.

Packing for 2 (or sometimes, three...John's swim trunks? Check...)...I digressed.

Since I chose not to breed (thank the Lord for small favors), I'm not quite used to being so responsible for the health and well being of someone else, but I did my damnedest to anticipate all of Mom's needs. Stockpile of magazines? Check. Warm clothes? Check. Small lap blanket? Check. Shaving her legs? Check. Checking that walker would go through the cabin's bathroom door? Screeching halt. S-C-R-E-E-C-H-I-N-G HALT! WTF??!

Now, when I booked the cruise, Eduardo, my cruise 'assistant' ensured me that I had the largest room next to the penthouse. Liar, liar, his pants are on fire. I quizzed him at length about the room setup and was assured that this room would work for the three of us. This room was nowhere near the largest, as could be evidenced by the fact that John and I peered into and entered many rooms on our frantic rush to the front desk of the Carnival Pride to try and rectify this potentially lethal situation. Mom, thankfully, took this development with grace and humor and laid down for a nap, content in the thought that 'I had it' (thanks again, Phyllis).

Let me tell you, the front desk personnel were not the friendliest, or most sympathetic folk. In fact, they could have cared less about our plight. Just wait until that 21 year old who 'helped' us ages...Note to self: I knew there was a reason I didn't want to sail with Carnival...

Anyway, I was in a mild panic, which escalated, when we found that the cruise was fully booked and we couldn't move to a more appropriate cabin. And, as the time neared to pulling out from the dock, the panic really set in. We just couldn't be trapped on this ship with a 93 year old who couldn't use the cabin bathroom! OMG! WTF? I repeat. WHAT THE F....!!!! So, we bundled Mom back up and raced downstairs where a manager assured me that we wouldn't be trapped. Turns out that they tell people they're leaving at 4 instead of the planned 5 pm departure for the 'dawdlers.' Why can't people just be on time? Anywho...

The manager was quite accommodating while listening to my panicked plea to please let us off this boat! She calmed me down and escorted our small party through the bowels of the ship. We were salmon swimming upstream but, shoot, I didn't care. All I longed for was the shore of the good old Baltimore cruise port.

I breathed a sigh of relief once we hit the on ramp (an 'off ramp' for our purposes...) and rolled back into the port to sit and wait for our luggage, which appeared 1.15 hours later. The port employees were quite wonderful and were, unlike Carnival, sympathetic to our plight. So, here we were, 3 very weary 'travelers' (having traveled an hour to the port), dumped unceremoniously in a small heap in plastic chairs being looked upon in askance from others boarding. And, on Mother's Day, no less. Shoot....

John and I did have the foresight to pack a few cocktails in mom's wheelchair - we figured we could always tell security, if they found the hidden stash, that mom needed her little nip to keep her quiet...So, after a trip to the vending machine and under the 'non'-watchful eyes of the security guard (no sense of humor at all), a Pepsi (yuck) was had and poured along with a few miniatures of Seagrams. I went to take the picture posted above and the same security guard who was so on the ball (missing the fact that a 93 year old was getting drunk in front of her) yelled at me that no photos were allowed and I had to delete it. Yeah, right. Witness the fact that I have the photo...

But, lessons learned:

1. Although I've long realized it, John is an amazing, extraordinary man. He took the travails of yesterday with very good graces, much the way my Dad would have. I can't even imagine how my life would have been in prior years when I wasn't with a good traveler. The contrast was striking as John hid his own disappointment and was noting but supportive to both Mom and me. There was no anger, no resentment, no 'you ruined my good time.' John is as interested in keeping my mom healthy and happy as I am and is a full team member of 'Team Gert.' I can't imagine life without him. I'm firmly in love with this fabulous man. Amazing, fabulous man. His wisdom way belies his years. I'm struck on a daily basis to how similar to my Dad he is. Dad would have loved this man. As does Mom. This time around, I got it so right it's amazing.


Mom said that my Bubie (my grandmother) used to say that things work out for the best. I didn't realize that this creed, which I've long adopted, was in my genes. I firmly, FIRMLY believe that everything happens for the best. And, that though has gotten me through some pretty horrible times.

So, in the end, we decided to crash dinner at Ron's house where merriment was revisited. Steaks were served up, family warmth was provided, plenty of wine was had, and, well, a calm port within the storm was provided. And, in the end, perhaps that's where Mother's Day for my darling, wonderful mother was meant to be spent. Mom was certainly pleased, and, I believe, so was Dad. He wouldn't, however, be pleased with the fact that I appear to be out about $3K even though we have cruise insurance (don't book with Vacations to go....). Oh, I'm not about to give up but I've got a fight on my hands. Great. Just what I needed...

Readying for a cruise!

So far, all systems appear to be a 'go' but we won't know until the minute that we get on the ship that this vacation is actually happening. John and I have been walking a tightrope between talking to Mom about the cruise and not talking to Mom about the cruise. Too much cruise excitement talk seems to get Mom a bit nervous, not enough and she forgets we're going! Eh, that's ok. As her doctor told her "If you start getting worried or nervous about the trip, just remember that your daughter's got it." WHAT? I'm the one who's 'Got It?' Nice way to put pressure on the daughter, Phyllis! So, now, I'm trying to make sure I've got everything, from contraband liquor (it's going in her wheelchair), to fresh DVDs for the computer (1st year of the Mary Tyler Moore show), magazines (6 People magazines I've been storing away) - check. Got it. Wow, I really do got it - um, have it. I really do have it! John and I, at least, are really looking forward to a nice relaxing time.  And, gambling! Yes! I get to get my fix! Hot diggity.

Ok, this next piece is going to be a bit weird but: The arc bobs against a god. I was required to put that sentence in my blog to prove that I own this particular piece of work. I'm signing up for more writing assignments - this one is a review of products and websites so you might be seeing some strange stuff here soon (not that you haven't already)...eHow has changed their format and I'll still get residuals from them but won't be adding any new articles. I tried Firehow which pays about a penny for 3 views - uncheck. I'm writing for Break Studios which is a kick as they pay $8 per article and I'm finding I can write 4 articles an hour - not a bad clip. My goal next month is to try for $400 from Break alone. That's dependent though on how quickly they approve the articles. So, The arc bobs against a god it is.

Had all 6 dogs here for the last 2 days and got one great picture out of the mix but, let me tell ya, 6 dogs, no matter how wonderful they are, is a LOT. I'm confident now that I won't be that old lady dog hoarder - it's just too much work to clip 23 feet (Hops is missing 1), a total of 99 toenails! And, today is bath day which should take me about 3 hours. The ladies get bathed in the kitchen sink to save my aching back (yes, it gets sanitized after) and the boys get the hose. And, I haven't counted Mom into the mix - bath day is actually Saturday but I thought it would be a nice visual to include her here...

 Pictures will be forthcoming...

1st day of Spring; 1st day of boating!

John and I were fabulously happy on Saturday, sailing around the Chesapeake in 70 degree weather. It's been gorgeous all week around here - perfect sailing weather with light winds pushing us around for 4 hours. We fortified ourselves with our newest invention: pineapple infused-vodka and club soda (PVC for short). I've taken to infusing vodka now which is a great time, albeit, not my smartest move ever as it's quite easy to take 'just a little sip' to check the flavor. Note to self: move the vodka infuser out of sight...

The marina had a nice sock-burning party when we returned which signaled the start of the boating season (no need for socks any longer!). So, we took Rita and Matee over and mingled a bit. The ladies (and John....sigh....) drew lots of 'oohs and ahs' - Rita was particularly darling, if I do say so myself. More PVC was had....

Spent the night on the boat and got up yesterday, grabbed some breakfast and the ladies and headed over to Chesapeake Beach for a sit on the sand before heading home. The girls had a blast speeding around the sand, chasing each other. Found a few sharks teeth. Nice morning.

We've rented a house for a week in June down at Chesapeake Beach so drove past it to check location -fabulous! Mom will be coming with us (figured it was easier to bring Gert to the beach than try to get her covered for 7 days) and the house is 3 story with an elevator - waterfront balconies on all floors and a patio to boot. Bay front (50 feet from water) means lots of fishing, crabbing, and general merry making. We'll even be able to bring Namaste down for the days but there's no dock so we'll run her back to the marina every night - not a bad way to spend 30 minutes...

There's a little dive bar (just our speed) right around the corner so we expect that's where we'll be rolling for happy hour. The house is right on the boardwalk so we envision taking Mom out daily for a roll along the bay. There's even a pier where we can set her up under an umbrella for some fishing and crabbing. I believe a great time will be had by all! We're all very excited about heading on vacation together - we'll take the small girl dogs with us but, sadly, the boys will have to remain at home this time.

Friday, took Mom out over to Kentlands to get her a few things she needed. She gets out of the car, looks down with her one good eye and spies a shiny dime. Cool! Found MONEY! The funniest thing was that, just that morning, John sent over a picture of a $10 roll of quarters he found down at the marina while walking to the bathroom. So, the day netted us $10.10. Sounds like a lottery number.

Another glorious weekend in Key West

So, got Mom set up with 5 caregivers so John and I could head out on a mini-vacation for 4 days to Key West. Gert and all the caregivers survived; in fact, Mom was pretty looking pretty good when I came home. What a relief as she didn't do so well last time we were gone - but that was a 7 day trip and that's just too long to leave her, even though Sharyn was here for all 7 days and Sharyn's as on point as I am.... Anyway, huge thanks this time around to Carina, Ruth Ann, Mark, Bobbi and, of course, Sophia. You guys make our lives so much easier, and pleasurable!

Anyway, John and I flew off to Fort Lauderdale Feb 26th and grabbed a car for the drive to Key West - sweet talked the counter agent into a Mustang convertible which was a joy to drive but not much fun in which to be a passenger. The passenger seat is almost bolted directly to the floor so the top of my nose was 'eye to eye' with the top of the dashboard. I looked like a 4 year old in a car seat too big! And, sadly, John got to drive on the way down....oh well...

We made just a few quick stops before shooting down to KW in 4 short hours - that car moved!

Weather was cool but certainly better than DC - days were around mid-60s until, of course, our last day when it was 72 at 8 am...

Got a great hotel room right off Elizabeth street, just 1 block up from the Conch Republic. Gorgeous B&B with a continental breakfast and complimentary top shelf happy hour thrown in. And, to make matters sweeter, I talked our way into $50 less per night than we originally book AND a bigger suite! Sweet it was! Hotel was the Key West Harbor Inn for future reference and the room was the Jamaica room. The thing had a shower to die for....

We kicked around Key West for a day and then decided to do the trip over to the Dry Tortugas on the 'Vomit Comet' - well, that's what the crew called the 78' catamaran, Sunny Days. The wind was blowing at 15-20, seas were high with 5-6' swells and, of the 25 passengers on board, there were only about 6 of us standing at the end. John and I were bright enough to fuel our bag with saltine crackers which are a thing of beauty when one's stomach is tossing to and fro. I shared some with a few other passengers before I realized that we were going to NEED them. And, forget about bloody mary's on that ship - ugh. The trip to the Dry Tortugas did spur an eHow though:

How to Prevent Motion Sickness

Here's another quick one I wrote up:

How to Save Money In Key West Florida

Fort Jefferson was awesome though as we kicked around the island for 4 hours before setting off back to KW. Sadly, we didn't get to snorkel which is, reportedly, fabulous snorkeling as the waters were too churned up and it was too cool out. The Gods were with us on the ride home though as the weather cleared and it was a much smoother ride.

We spent the 2 hours on the ride back sitting on the stern of the catamaran, talking to Andy, one of the mates. He had us in tears the whole way home with his stories. He also told us of the best place in KW to get fresh fish - Bo's Fish Wagon. So, of course, once we hit shore, it was time for that free happy hour, showers, and off to feed.

Now, if you're interested in high class restaurants on the water with tablecloths, candles and $14 martinis (yes, that's true...) don't even bother reading the rest of the paragraph. But, if you're like us and prefer the true island ambience, a local's paradise, and the freshest fish outside the water - here you go. The fish here was, bar none, the best fish I've ever in my life had. Grilled Mahi that was caught just hours before was lovingly prepared with their 'special' spices which Andy assured me was not just Old Bay and, man, it wasn't. Sadly, they don't sell the mix outside the restaurant or we would have been toting a lot home. John got his requisite burger which was the best on the island also. Great food and a wonderful time, sitting at the bar on the street watching the 'tourists' go by.

After dinner, we waddled off to Duvall Street where we took our places in the window of the Bull and Whistle for a few hours before hitting another couple of bars and calling it an early night around 8:30 or so. Went back to the room and collapsed, tired, full and happy. Until...

John and I both woke up at 2:45 am with one thought on our mind - PIZZA! Yes! We were in KW and HAD to have some Angelina's pizza! This is the best pizza in the northern hemisphere, only being bested by a slice I had somewhere in Scotland, or possibly France one time - it was downed with one of the best beers I've ever had, hence the loss of memory....

So, we climbed into our clothes and headed out to the streets right as the drunks were coming in. Angelina's closes at 3:30 am so we had plenty of time for slices and beer before slinking back to our hotel room for the rest of the night. Woke up at 7, fat and happy.

Basically spent 3 days doing the above, with some wandering the streets and shopping thrown in before heading to Ft. Lauderdale for the last night of our 4 day tour.

On thing I love about John is that he's as impulsive and adventurous as I am. So, as we talked, we devised a 'non-plan' - we decided to 'wing it' and cancelled the Ft. Lauderdale hotel (where we stayed last time) and just wander up Rt. 1 N until we found an oceanfront hotel for the night (hopefully with an oceanfront hot tub) so we did just that. We rolled into Pelican Cove on Deer Key and got a great room. Spent some time in the hot tub before heading up to get cleaned up for dinner. Had a magnificent time, standing on a pier on the Gulf side of the key watching a gorgeous sunset before heading off to another local spot for dinner. Alas, no dolphins or manatees in sight...

All in all, a great trip was had one more time. It's such a joy to have someone fun to travel with - truly a joy.

So, it's time to plan our next trip. We're thinking maybe of taking Mom to the outer banks in June for a week - that way, we can get a week 'away' and have Mom with us at the same time. It's a win-win situation! Or, there's that Baltimore cruise to Bermuda in July...Wherever we end up, we'll have a blast - just like this time. What fun!


Below is my favorite graffiti from this trip. KW has the best graffiti...

Meant to post about our last cruise...

..Time got away from me.

John and I had a very fun cruise over Thanksgiving to Grand Turk (gotta wonder what 'Little Turk' looks like), St. Maarten and Puerto Rico. I would not recommend the ship though - Holland America Westerdam; it just wasn't one of the nicer ships we've been on and even the food was not particularly good. The room, however, was a gorgeous upgrade with a great balcony - about 3x our normal size.

What struck me the most was, the moment we walked on board, I noticed that I was surrounded by 2,000 Gert and Joes. John was definitely one of the youngest passengers on board. We both spent most of the cruise helping these darling little old people. I was always picking up something or straightening lap blankets, etc. John would see these folks scratching their heads in front of the non-intuitive coffee machine every morning and would punch the right button or them. They were always most appreciative...

About the 5th day on board, I actually awoke earlier than John and went to get coffee - now, this was the first time I'd done it so, I'm sorta waking up, sorta scratching my head as I stand in front of this non-intuitive machine and punching 'buttons' on the machine that are not buttons. Quite sadly, and much to my dismay, a younger person came up to help me. I was appreciative...

We did have a great cruise and had these wonderful pictures taken. We both love these. We had so much fun. We have so much fun every single day. How wonderful!